And that scares me to death because I am what I would call a “At Risk Spouse” and vulnerable and need to watch myself every step. 5) If same sex couples are not capable of being parents, what about single mothers or single fathers. This website is not owned by or affiliated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (sometimes called the Mormon or LDS Church). Those that are completely hetero (sorry, fella, but I’m glad ya cared) don’t make the connection of oral and/or anal sex to homosexuality. Most people with oral herpes were infected as children. Exercise of that capability will enhance muscle control, not destroy it. No loss that your wife won’t see the bishop re: your marital issues. The first is from President Hinckley: “We want to help these people, to strengthen them, to assist them with their problems and to help them with their difficulties. Sealed in the temple. I pray and fast to be able to deal with the emotional pain and difficulty of it all. The question is “do you live the law of chastity” unless we feel something else is wrong. Rather (and obviously for the less comprehension-impaired), my comment addressed the alleged health threats noted in the original post of this thread. If he did ask the SP about appropriateness of taking further disciplinary action, events reveal that the SP didn’t agree it warranted that level of attention. Genital herpes is a different virus to oral herpes, but in some rare cases, either can be transmitted to the other area. Please accept my apology if you were offended.”. As for a Mormon KGB, there wouldn’t be this business of “member spying” if there wasn’t a Central Intelligence Agency to report to, that was willing and desirous to act. I have read in several places that the two official reasons for sex are procreation and the emotional bonding between spouses. Finding is not easy, it requires learning, communicating, pondering, praying, doing stuff, I know if you do you’ll find joy and peace. Remember, while these guidelines reflect general attitudes, talk to your spouse about their specific needs in these areas, by following recommendation number 5 below. So, this is not a good argument against oral or anal sex per se. I try as best as I can to provide sound advice that is research, medically, psychologically and gospel based. Nick: Michael, you obviously haven’t read Song of Solomon. To receive the gift of eternal life one needs to know how to use the gift to make it a true gift. Not to get too personal, but I know that when I’ve gone in for a rectal exam myself in which only a finger is used with lubrication I have a hard time having a normal bowel movement for several days afterwards. Thus, when the time comes to actually make love in an acceptable and sacred manner with their spouse, they may have conflicting feelings. I was fortunate to be able to leave the Ward and get a better perspective on the situation. Since Natasha is the real professional here, I hesitate to comment. While I’m no medical expert, I can say that of the hundreds of gay men I know, I’ve never once heard of one getting an infection from anal sex, with the exception of sexually transmitted infections. Desperate Husband, there are a lot of books out there. The Divorce generally doesn’t solve problems but only adds to them unless its an extreme situation of abuse or abandonment. and a much more extensive one that you might find useful: http://www.a-womans-touch.com/dr_myrtle.php?articleID=3015. Although your description of the effects of taking semen into the mouth were patently ridiculous, you seemed to miss the larger picture. I take this to be a reference of the sacrament of marriage, which is not necessarilly a matter of sex – though that is implied. #52: The problem is that many define these terms in completely different ways. Let the Spirit guide you…but make sure you are worthy of the Spirit…no pornography! I can’t tell if this is a serious comment or not. I would be interested to compare numbers at some point. Thanks for the response. And a special thanks to all who apologized. We need to be talking about these types of issues more often. It’s a tough life,and I consider it part of my stewardship to make it as good as I can for those I love.I would not take risks with my health,but neither would my beloved. Avoid concubines. Many of the “unnatural” or “troubling” practices are conditioned purely by Western culture. Congrats. You can just stop right there and not go to the bishop or stake president as they really have no business to what goes on in your bedroom. 1. we don’t like to censor comments, but some of you have clearly crossed some lines of good taste. It seems to me that if you’re having sexual relations with multiple wives, some of those wives might not find the concept of oral / anal sex with other women to be very savory (i.e. Yea, you wouldn’t want those pesky Prophets to get in the way of your science. -#14: Wow! While there are many health problems which can accellerate the problem, fecal incontinence is often part of the natural aging process. Oh, and how we’ve gotten this far without mentioning “Of Souls, Symbols and Sacraments”, I have no idea. Or, because of their same sex, can they only “lust” each other? You have insisted that others “shut-up” or “watch their tone” etc, even at one point trying rouse emotion by pricking at what you percieved to be the sexual insecurities of us “men”. There are many resources which can provide you with information on proper hygiene in this regard. i contacted him via email and after 24 hrs my story changed. I, too, lack confidence in your scientific assessment on the hazards of semen. Natasha, my apologies. Once produced, find me ANY scriptural reference to back it up. 2) Sex for pleasure only in marriage is great, not sin. I have spent six years in Utah (primarily BYU but not entirely). Just such a device is the rationalization that lust is love. Sexuality not only creates a stronger bond between husband and wife, but has the power to heal previous wounds or stress–inside or outside of marriage. Therefore, it cannot neutralize the mildly acidic semen. What say you? This stimulation often feels good and can even mimic orgasm for both males and females. I think that’s a good thing. It’s notable that the examples you claim to have known were all over the age of 50. A lot depends on the prayers you offer before you go in to see him because maybe one or two of his words can be the answer to the prayer you offered previously. When I have attempted to talk with her about my feelings on the matter she has pretty much told me that she is who she is and she is not going to change. Even if it requires talking about something over several days, weeks, months, or even years. What is appropriate within marriage and what isn’t? you talking about your sphincter again? Thank you, thank you, thank you! I realize I have a different view on this issue. David O McKay in early career said [birth control] “often tends to put the marriage relationship on a level with the panderer and the courtesan. By the way, he may have been completely wrong. Then suddenly it all makes sense. Well, if exceptions are justifiable for some, then it opens the door for others to question why they cannot enjoy the same exception. You used penis, vagina, anus, rectum, orgasm, semen, tactile pleasure, etc. In terms of wearing a condom during anal sex, if two men (or a man and a woman) are fully committed to each other (little risk of STDs), a condom is actually not necessary. Only a small portion of the population has same sex attraction. Better to avoid these messy problems and that also goes for oral sex situation because couples will know if it is wrong or ‘feel’ that something is wrong if indeed it is wrong to do. Let’s not mistake one another. But she did, eventually, lighten up. If a person’s only experience consists of rare digitial rectal exams, then yes, it will be uncomfortable. In all likelihood, you’ve had one or more bowel movements which were larger. What did Pres. It is not the first time it has got me in trouble and won’t be the last. But my HP group doesn’t have anyone under 35 in it, so maybe my suspicions that its a generational thing aren’t too far off the mark. I once attended a seminar where the speaker suggested praying before sex. This is a whole other issue we can discuss I guess at another time, but I see sexual withdrawal and the unwillingness to address legitimate emotional/physical intimacy issues within marriage as a form of emotional abuse. I think they have the perfect answer to the guidance members need in their intimate relationships. I think you are just rationalizing your behavior, or the behavior of those you are trying to defend. There once was a man from Nantuckett, whose…. Amazingly, the only banned sexual acts include sex with the same sex, and animals. I also applaud the mature and thoughtful responses to such an important issue. Persons who have been through the temple are aware of the responsibility to keep their thoughts and actions pure and, furthermore, have been counseled to avoid any unholy, unnatural, or impure practice. In the meantime, I believe you have spoken your piece and made your feelings known. My husband is 40, our marriage is awesome, he’s just not interested in sex like he used to be. It is a sin to enter the temple unworthily. Those sexually transmitted infections are every bit as likely from vaginal intercourse as anal intercourse, however. And even when it is canonized, the interpretations can often be numerous, and exceptions to the rule can exist. And on what basis do you make that claim? I warn that some of the articles she links to may have information that some in the LDS faith will not agree with and even find offensive. And no, saying that “anything goes” (more specifically, anything mutually agreed to, which one must use good judgement and common sense as to an “agreement” existing) is not an excuse to risk injury, EVEN if the spouse accepts the risk. However, many African and Asian cultures, as well as most of the animal kingdom, have naturally mated using the rear entry for centuries. Source:http://exmormon.org/phorum/read.php?2,1532859. I hope that we can all be tolerant of a story that addresses the powerful feelings of “first love” (or have we forgotten how powerful they are? It is a potent and powerful combination of chemicals. I agree with Michael. I must be childish, because I must say this had me laughing so hard I almost peed my pants. By the way you didn’t address the (serious) question of why you would consider man-on-women anal sex as problematic (#2 in OP) but not man-on-man anal sex? Natasha Helfer Parker Just because gays are born with the propensity for same sex attraction doesn’t make it right to engage in homosexual activity. We are so proud of you. Please explain? I say “be yet not afraid” and turn these lemons into lemonade, Use President McKay’s teachings to justify kinky role-playing: wife is the “whore” and husband is the “john”. Reading this as an 18 year old that just gave my girl an orgasm, and wanted to make sure oral sex was fine by church standards. 7) If other couples can marry for companionship, why not gays and lesbians? As Cowboy said, don’t paint us all with the same brush. Yeah, it does, and my oldest daughter, age 37, has paid dearly for being overweight. transmission of bodily fluids between wives via the husband). It’s a bit odd to me to say one hand, “I love the Church” and on the Other say “I hate the Church’s society”. So it brings up the question – are the current statements (including the Proclamation)on sex, pro-creation and marriage merely “perspectives” of the Brethren or do they represent the will of our Lord and Saviour? This reminds me of the previous post on “the great novel” that Mormon Girl wrote about. Yea, you wouldn’t want those pesky Prophets to get in the way of your science. 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